The Antidote to Fear

I was taking the elevator ride up to studio 6B at 30 Rock.
Terrified.
It was going to be my very first time on national television (The Conan O’Brien Show). I was petrified, I was excited, I was somehow built for this.
I knew, deep in my soul, that the only way to guarantee my triumph was to flirt. With everyone. No matter what. Flirt or bomb. There was no in between.

Which, oddly and strangely, reminds me of right now.
There are moments in life where we lose our ability to waffle, wobble, sink into self-doubt, or waste time.
We are pressed to live fully and with complete aliveness.
Or bomb.
Now is one of those times.

We are all facing the extreme fragility of life.

We are petrified, we are excited, we are somehow built for this.
It is a time in our lives where the feminine brilliance in each of us must take the lead.
Times like this are clearly above and beyond our patriarchal world culture’s ability to handle.
No blame. It is simply time for a new (ancient) approach.

The coronavirus is terrifying.
We can’t just stop being afraid. That’s like trying to not think about a pink elephant.
We have to reach for a new tool, a new paradigm, like the choice-makers that each of us are.
Even when, especially when, it may sound crazy, or trivial, or unimportant.
We have to get out of the masculine and into the womanly.

It is time for each of us to allow our embodied feminine genius to take the f*@ck over, and create a new paradigm.

We cannot do this when we are afraid. Fear and anxiety land us in a place of self absorption, which creates so much suffering. When we are scared, we can turn against others, rather than stand for them. And our choices have a huge impact on everyone around us.

One of the fastest ways out of fear is the Womanly Art of Flirtation. The way out of self absorption is flirtation. The way of recognizing the sacred interconnectedness of all beings is flirtation. The way of actually having a fun connection with another human being is flirtation.

Flirtation is the tool to reach for when a woman wants to make the choice to really live her aliveness, fully, not just survive. This is where each of us gets to be a quantum physician – we can choose to seduce our aliveness from the jaws of fear, by flirting. Flirting is not trivial. It is the ancient knowledge of seducing or courting life back to itself. We can actually direct the outcome of any situation, by connecting to our turned-on life force, and using it to not only take ourselves, but everyone in the world, higher. We are electing to honor the gift of life, in every moment, knowing that we are not immortal, but we get to share this precious fragile life, right now.

Flirtation and fear cannot live in the same sentence.

When you decide to flirt, you are choosing to actually connect with your sensual aliveness, rather than connect with your fear. Yes, you are the choice maker. Fear evaporates because you are taking your valuable attention and choosing to enjoy and relish the privilege of your aliveness, and the aliveness of other beings, in that moment. We are embracing the joy of our interconnectedness, rather than the fear. Which changes everything.

Fortunately, the Womanly Art of Flirtation is actually the natural resting state for a woman who chooses to plug in to her sensual aliveness. Flirtation is in our DNA. Flirtation is a way that a woman makes her way in the world, with her passion fully engaged, her lights on, and her juices flowing. Flirtation is all about enjoying yourself, for no apparent reason, other than it is a privilege to be a woman and a joy to have the power and the ability to turn on. Flirtation is nothing more and nothing less than choosing to enjoy yourself in the presence of another person or persons. Women were born to flirt. If we are not flirting, we are not living. We limp along, glumly, victimized by every hap and mishap.

Flirtation removes so many barriers that we create between ourselves and others. When we plug in to our power source, we create the opening for others to plug into theirs. There is no room for negativity. Flirtation removes fear, criticism, and fault finding. The tension in the body melts away.

It is like walking through life with arms open instead of fists clenched.

Flirting is about finding all the rights, not the wrongs, in this world. Why? Because each of us are plugged in to our life force.
Can we flirt our way through this crisis?
Let’s find out…

With so much love and pleasure,

Regena is a feminist icon, a teacher, a speaker, a mother, a best-selling author, and creatrix and CEO of The School of Womanly Arts.

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