Fear creeps in.
We get tired. Bored. Angry.
Disheartened. Discouraged. Disempowered.
And when we trip, or are tripped, when we tumble or get truly and deeply trounced, we can forget the real raw sacred truth of it all.
That we are each a force of nature, indivisible from her power. Capable of creating anything and everything we desire.
Each of us.
No matter our age, our background, our education, every woman is loaded with this creative energy. We are creatrixes.
Even under patriarchal oppression, even under every racist, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, frightened and furious hand that wants to keep us down, we can create.
And part of our challenge, as women, is to remain conscious of our power, despite the slings and arrows.
We have power to create, in any direction.
In our own perfect, intimate lives, we can create more joy, more abundance, more love. And we can create more darkness, more despair, more misery.
It is all an inside job.
That requires practice.
I have a story of my own. My assistant of seven years — really, a cherished family member/co-parent to my daughter — followed a calling to leave the country and return to her homeland with her family. The whisper had been building inside of her for a long time, and suddenly her documents came through. Fearing she would change her mind, because of her love for her life here, she bought her tickets home that very day. It all happened at, as I say, the speed of p—y.
And I wasn’t ready. On a practical level, I was about to move home and office, and was in the process of completely restructuring my company, and those things felt impossible without her support and presence. And, emotionally, I was happy for her but deeply sad at my own loss.
After sharing the news with me and our team, we all had a good cry (truth: on the daily). I knew there was a huge task for me ahead: imagining past the circumstances and my sadness, and using my innate feminine power of manifestation to create an outcome even greater than any of us could possibly imagine.
What I wanted to do was to get lost in the grief, the fear, the worry.
The overwhelming task list.
I wanted to feel powerless and helpless.
The pull was fierce.
What I chose to do was reach through the fear, and use my power of creation.
With no sense of actually believing its power.
No sense of confidence.
It was a choice I made because I knew it was the only option I had to create a best outcome.
Truth be told, even though I’ve been practicing this for years, it still feels hard.
No — I take that back. It feels impossible.
How will I ever be able to create something even better than what I had? How will I be able to do this despite my explosive emotions? Fears? Monster to-do lists? Family responsibilities?
How do I exchange my habitual helplessness and reach for manifestation magic? When I don’t even want to?
Manifestation. It’s that thing you do. That we all do. We imagine something, and then, poof! It happens. Sometimes it’s little things, like finding a miraculous parking spot in the middle of a bustling metropolis. Sometimes it’s bigger things, like envisioning a desired political outcome, meeting your soulmate, attracting a new job.
And I’m not talking, by the way, about “manifestation” that requires you to be a certain kind of spiritual, to be a certain kind of good, to have no resistance, no blocks, only love and light. As though you aren’t a human person in an imperfect, unjust world.
The manifestation I’m talking about is when you connect with your desire and your divinity at the same time, and sh— gets real.
The task is to make space on the inner for that which is greater than you, to collaborate on the outcome. You have heard the expression, ‘let go and let god(dess)’? The part we have to let go of is all the static, all the interference of our fears, worries, concerns, all the past betrayals, and we do that by feeling them first. From our depression, discouragement, and disappointment, we can fly into a new stratosphere.
What I had to do was not just process all my difficult emotions, not just get lost in the swirl of uncertainty and change that surrounded me, not just get flattened by the ever-growing list of demands, but, rather, do all of that and then take time to envision what I wanted and how I wanted to feel. I needed to jump outside of my chaos and imagine into what I wanted to manifest.
This is not easy, because the urge to stay powerless is nearly intoxicating.
It feels so very attractive and comfortable. Our larger patriarchal culture is designed to place a million pinholes in a woman’s true magnificence, every moment of her life. So that she might forget what she is capable of creating.
The short ending to this story is that I found a wonderful new woman for the position, who, just two weeks in, is fantastic. (It sometimes goes this way, and sometimes takes a few tries to get it right.)
This envisioning, this feeling into, this muscle called manifesting, can and must be practiced.
If we each practice a little bit, every day, the muscle develops and becomes stronger and stronger.
So, let’s practice together, today, sisters.
What is something small that would add some lovely to your day?
Let me give you an example. I worked some minor manifestation magic the other day. I was going on a site visit with my team to a magnificent church, and this church has one of the largest organs in the world. I thought it would be wonderful if I could manifest hearing the organ being played. So, I imagined it. I felt it. I shared my desire with my team. And I was not attached to it.
Sure enough, about 20 minutes into the visit, the organ tuner unexpectedly arrived.
And those of you who follow my instagram stories, got to hear it right along with me.
No matter if you feel lost right now.
Or emotionally overwhelmed.
Uncertain where to begin or how to begin.
Feeling deeply disconnected to your power.
Or feeling connected …
You are a conjuring queen.
So, back to that question, what is something that would add a bit of joy to your day?
Nothing you want is frivolous.
Your joy matters. To you, to me, to the world.
So what’s it going to be?
A great parking spot?
Someone opening a door for you?
A free coffee?
Your favorite song playing when you walk into the supermarket or turn on Pandora?
Give yourself 24 hours to let your magic loose.
For fun, pop over to our Facebook page and tell me what you conjure. I wanna see.
Regena Thomashauer, aka “Mama Gena”
The School of Womanly Arts
Regena is a feminist icon, a teacher, a speaker, a mother, a best-selling author, and creatrix and CEO of The School of Womanly Arts.