Darlings,
Let me be frank.
The Worldwide Sister Goddess Reunion is not for everyone.
There are some women who are content to color inside the lines.
And then…there are Sister Goddesses. Women who are interested in creating their own illustrations. In teasing, cajoling, seducing, and inviting their desires. Women who are ready to have more…and willing to do something about it.
To be perfectly clear, here’s a list of 15 things you will NOT get if you come to Miami.
1.) Muumuus and turtlenecks.
Sister Goddesses have become infamous for treating every sidewalk in South Beach as their runway. Miami is the prime opportunity to rock your hottest Beach Goddess gear. Bikinis, tunics, maxi dresses, whatever is your pleasure! Just wait ’til you see the ensembles I’ve got lined up…
2.) Michael Bolton ballads.
The city of Miami pulses to a Latin beat, with music emanating from nearly every block. And inside the classroom, DJ Song Siren has one main objective: getting you to drop it like it’s hot. Her Miami playlist is always a surprise, but she has been known to crank Pitbull and Lady Gaga.
3.) Frostbite.
Weather reports are predicting abundant sunshine and high 70s, low 80s. Which means one thing: a pink towel invasion on the beach.
4.) Sex-appeal starvation.
While in South Beach, you will have the opportunity to feast yourself on as much or as little eye candy as you desire…
5.) Another night alone, on the couch, with takeout Chinese and Howie Mandel as your date.
No more sitting on the sidelines, sisters! No more spinning your wheels in isolation. This year we are unveiling the first ever Unbound Olympics, designed to help you press your pleasure edge. The more outrageous acts you perform, with your sisters bearing witness, the more unbound you become…
6.) Orderly conduct.
This IS Miami. And this IS the Worldwide Sister Goddess Reunion. And the topic IS “A Life Unbound,” after all! You can expect to spot Sister Goddesses turning ordinary moments into dance breaks, forming desire circles in the ocean, conjuring limo rides…. It’s all pleasure research.
7.) Cream of wheat.
If there’s one thing Miami has plenty of, it’s flavor. The city offers food for all of your senses, including countless opportunities to tantalize your taste buds—everything from Sushi Samba to Mango’s to Le Sandwicherie. Swing out.
8.) Wallflowers.
Consider Worldwide the greatest Pleasure Laboratory for women on the planet, designed to liberate your inner wallflower. Sister Goddesses have reported countless first experiences: first skinny dips, first tabletop dance solos, first desire rituals by moonlight…Last year we had an instance of naked parasailing. In what direction do you want to stretch?
9.) Netflix.
The Reunion is jam-packed with live, live, LIVE entertainment. Mama Gena’s entrances alone have been the talk of the town. Think motorcycles, bellydancers, and an army of women in bathrobes…and we’re not even talking about the Pink Party performers…
10.) Catfights.
While in Miami, you will be fully immersed in the key ingredient to creating everything you desire: Sisterhood. The Reunion is your playground, where every time you turn around, you’ll see a woman reflecting back your brilliance, knowing you are capable of getting everything you want and so much more.
11.) Stagnation.
From the moment women launch their desires into the classroom on Friday night, to their Sunday morning brags, magic happens. At Worldwide, you will witness transformations. And it’s infectious–one woman ignites another like wildfire until the entire city is ablaze.
12.) Wrinkle Cream and Pantyhose.
This isn’t your average box of cracker jacks. We’ve got a juicy giveaway in store for each of you, and special gold, silver, and bronze medal prizes for our three lucky winners of the Unbound Olympics! The more you play, the better your chances…
13.) Waffling.
Indecision kills creation. I will be delivering brand-new, cutting-edge material on how to break the chains that bind you and lunge, with abandon, for what you want. Time to ditch your victimhood and step into the role of creatrix of your own life.
14.) Mother Goose Storytime.
You’ll get a sneak peek at the Pleasure Queen’s upcoming memoir…
15.) Self-acceptance and other stale, self-help jargon.
Self-acceptance is old news, sisters. Self-CELEBRATION is the minimum daily requirement for living A Life Unbound. The School of Womanly Arts does not concern itself with exploring problems. Instead, we conduct experiments in pleasure. The question is: are you willing to do the research?
Of course, I cannot reveal every trick up my sleeve. In order to learn every delicious ingredient of the unbinding cocktail, you’ve got to get yourself to Miami.
This is your last chance to enroll; you have until Friday, November 11th at 3PM EST to register online!
With so much love and pleasure,
Mama Gena
This event already happened. Check out The Immersion: Miami.
