Sometimes, (ok, maybe all the time…) the truth is hard to hear.
From without, or from within.
Especially when it runs counter to our thoughts and expectations for ourselves or others.
I have been a spoken word rock star, doing live shows for thousands of students, setting pussies free, and turning women on for 21 years.
I’ve worked with the most incredible team of women on my staff, each one brilliant – a work of living art.
It takes so much teamwork, effort, brilliance, negotiation, fierce frame holding, and sheer pussy power to put on a live event.
Well, we are boldly going where no woman has gone before.
We are opening the doors of her raw, wild, feminine nature, the gateway to her deepest betrayals, violations, and shame.
These fierce pussy warriors and I bravely and brazenly held the doors open for centuries of repression, pain, and shame to erupt in safety and community. We welcomed the whiplash of the eye of the most ignored and violent storm in our society, and yelled ‘bring it on!’. And we did this right out in the open of our misogynistic, sexist, xenophobic culture.
Brilliant, blessed fun!
And so challenging. So game-changing for so many women.
But in the last year of teaching, I noticed that the usual level of challenges we faced kept expanding. For example, instead of our venue threatening to throw us out, they actually did throw us out. Which, as you can imagine, sent out a giant ripple of chaos, creating complex problems for my tiny team to solve.
And hey, I get it. Women’s bodies are considered profane in our culture, and I am in the business of celebrating them, and teaching women to feel wildly free and proud of every aspect of themselves. Not everyone agrees with my perspective. Pushback is inevitable.
Other challenges followed, and over the next few months, I realized that my pussy was trying to get my attention.
The challenges were a wake up call from my higher power.
It was time for a change, a shift, a reboot.
The Great Pussy in the Sky was turning up the volume for me.
My glorious, wild warrior woman had been running the show for a long time. And my soft animal body* had had enough.
If we had not gotten pushback on such a large scale, I might have ignored that part of me.
My warrior loved running the show, loved setting pussies free, loved doing whatever it takes.
But my soft animal wanted her day. Her way.
And I could hear her whisper: Back to the brownstone
What did she mean?
She wanted me to work, as I had done in the very early days of the school, with tiny groups of women.
She craved intimacy, not expansion.
She wanted a whole new direction.
My answer to her was “WHAAAAT? Are you kidding me? We have been having a blast with these huge events! Don’t you know? We are changing the world!!”
I was on the threshold of committing one of the gravest sins known to womankind:
A Pussy Bypass.
What is a Pussy Bypass?
It’s when your deepest intuition, your deepest truth is speaking to you, but you turn a deaf ear. She’s tugging at your sleeve, but you brush her away.
There are many reasons for this but it usually boils down to just one: our big fat ego is completely attached to the way we are accustomed to doing things, and we are afraid of change.
Here are some examples:
Could be a job that once served you, that no longer serves.
Could be a relationship that has worn threadbare over time, but you cling to its last shreds like it was your blankee, even though it no longer keeps you warm.
Could be the way you let your family run all over you, just because they always have.
Could be your care-taking has outlived its usefulness but you just can’t stop yourself from doing those dishes for your family, again.
Your marriage is dead or dying, but you pretend ‘everything is fine’ while you are quietly vaporizing.
Maybe your not so lil chickees have failed to leave the nest and are starting to make a mess in it.
Or it could be as simple as you go to a new masseuse and you can feel, from the first touch, this person does not get you, but instead of getting up and walking away, you choose to spend the next hour of your life in discomfort, instead of relaxation.
Can you find yourself here?
A Pussy Bypass is when you actually feel deep in your body and soul that something true, new, or unexpected is opening up, but you ignore it. You don’t trust it.
A Pussy Bypass is when change is happening so fast that you cling to the old ways rather than surrendering to what wants to come.
A Pussy Bypass is when you notice that smile on your face is forced or habitual, rather than your truth.
A Pussy Bypass is when your body says no but you say ‘shhhhh…’. (Remember my last blog on listening to my little jeep feet? :))
As a result of my pussy wake up call, I have completely redesigned the way I am running the SWA this year. I am not doing any large scale events. I am only doing two small-group Pussy Masterminds, so I can work intensely with an intimate class. I am really looking forward to this shift! Things have changed so quickly. I am still catching my breath. I still have so much desire for an online course and I want to do in-person courses again, in the future, but 2020 is all about listening to my soft animal body – first and foremost.
The speed of pussy is the speed of your truth.
Listening to her requires surrender.
Listening to her requires deep courage.
Listening to her never ever ever fails.
When you listen, you are demonstrating your deep trust in life itself.
And in the beautiful, generous spirit of pussy, it is never too late to tune in, to slow down, to pay attention. It requires great courage, but then, we women have great courage in spades.
We rock change.
We love growth.
Truth turns us on like nothing else.
How can you allow pussy her voice, in your own life?
Any pussy bypasses you might want to confess?
With so much love and pleasure,
Regena Thomashauer, aka “Mama Gena”
The School of Womanly Arts
*’soft animal body’ courtesy of Mary Oliver
Regena is a feminist icon, a teacher, a speaker, a mother, a best-selling author, and creatrix and CEO of The School of Womanly Arts.