Self Care

I wrote a whole book about coming out of hiding. Then I turned it in and hid.

August 10, 2026

Darling Sister, I typed the last word of On Our Knees, sent the whole manuscript to my editor, and did not celebrate.  No champagne. No dancing around the kitchen.  Instead I got what Brené Brown calls a vulnerability hangover — the sick, shaky comedown that hits after you hand strangers the most naked parts of […]

Confession: I am in the middle of a sprint, and pleasure is how I am winning it

June 23, 2026

Let me confess something to you, my love. Right now, as I write this, I am in the middle of a motherfucking sprint. Massive things are happening in my world, bigger than I can fully tell you yet. (One of the biggest lands on June 24, and you will be the very first to know. […]

Turn yourself on, on purpose (pleasure is not a reward you earn)

June 15, 2026

Sisters, Years ago, I was handed an assignment that sounded slightly absurd and more than slightly terrifying: prepare my home as if the most important person in the world were coming to visit.  Clean it. Fill it with beauty. Choose the food, the candles, the music. And then realize that the guest was me. That […]

This is for the women with desires for money AND a life

June 8, 2026

Sister, There was a year I came home from a book launch tour absolutely on fire with my own destiny. And then the IRS put a lien on everything I owned. I remember sitting on the floor of my apartment, back against the couch, staring at the letter. This was the life I had built. […]

Six ways women stay stuck (and call it self-care)

November 11, 2025

There’s a moment in every woman’s life when the desire to change becomes unbearable…and yet she doesn’t move. Instead, she keeps spinning in the same old orbit, chanting the same stories, performing the same roles with theatrical precision. You know what this looks like: Jobs that numb us. Relationships that dim us. Cities that ghost […]

Let the thaw begin…

March 25, 2025

The Spring Equinox is here. This is no ordinary change of seasons. This is the Earth’s great sigh of pleasure, her cosmic exhale after the hush of winter. It is the moment when darkness and light meet as equals, when the world shifts—stretching, softening, waking up. And you, my love, are not separate from this […]

The antidote to overextending

September 17, 2024

I have been a big, fat, giant, gorgeous ‘yes’ for many years of my life. Yes to orgasm, yes to pleasure. Yes to showing up and doing what it takes. Yes to leading the Pleasure Revolution. Yes to raising my child, by myself. Yes to writing books about P*ssy and Pleasure. Yes to travel. Yes […]

How are you…really?

February 9, 2021

How are you? It’s the simplest of questions. A typical greeting. A form of “hello”. But if you’re anything like me – raw, shaken, uplifted, forever changed, grief and gratitude-soaked after an unprecedented year – that question has felt heavier lately, more loaded. It was almost a year ago now, that I was diagnosed with […]

Are You Unwittingly Starving Your Feminine?

February 2, 2021

Do you know how to feed your feminine? What does she like? Dislike? What fuels her? Dries her up? What has her relax, turn on, unwind, feel the feels, connect to her higher power, embody her emotions, and most importantly…trust? The word ‘feed’ is from the Old English fedan, which means “to nourish, give food […]

Three tiny tools, three minutes, to bring you back home

December 1, 2020

It’s the week after Thanksgiving. We are rounding the bend, slogging towards Christmas with our masks firmly in place. At this point, there is not one of us whose lives have not been impacted directly or indirectly by the pandemic and its fallout. Add in economic losses, school closures, the election, reckoning with racial injustice, […]

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