A reminder that ritual is real.

Here’s what I do on the daily: coffee, stretch, music, dance, light candles, and pray at my altar.
That’s the morning ritual. It’s how I do.

I don’t know about you, but I do not wake up a ray of sunshine.
I need to move things through.
Every day. (And then some.)

Being a woman in this world requires ritual.
A return to who we know ourselves to be. Every day.

And women know Ritual.

Even if the culture would have us forget our knowing. When we hear each other’s practices, we remember what our great-great-great-grandmothers knew, what is ours, in the DNA. It isn’t lost.

Dance awakens my body. My aliveness. My hip bones and blood, the curl of my spine.
Coffee sparks my brain, perks my nervous system, warms my hands, fills my senses.
All of this comforts and nourishes me. Each step, a small, meaningful act of self-care.

And the candles. They are so important.
Candles honor my connection with the divine, with Goddess.
They are my thank-you, my prayer, and my hope.

The Virgin of Guadalupe is central to my altar. I brought her home, on my lap, from a trip to Mexico. She is exquisite. Mine has real eyelashes.
She is Source and Spirit.
She is glamorous, beautiful, and understatedly sexy.
She reminds me of my holiness.
And of yours.
Every single woman, divine.

Each morning I express gratitude, as I light candles around her.
I set intentions.
And connect with my desires.
And then I go about my day, knowing it’s begun from a centered place, a beautiful place.

Simple ritual like this graces every area of my life.

When my team and I began planning for our most recent event, The Experience that happened the first weekend of this month, we gathered in my living room, circled around the Virgin and all she represents, and lit candles. On squares of colored post-its, we wrote 100 intentions for the event, and placed them on the altar.

I should mention that at that particular moment, we had NO IDEA that any of our desires were in any way possible. That is the fun, the risk, the challenge of living inside the feminine. There is never any evidence that your desires will manifest, in fact, there is very often LOTS of evidence, really really factual and good real-life real-world hard evidence, that there is NO reason for anything you long for to actually come true.

And in this particular case, the deck was severely stacked against us. But, those of you who read my books, take my classes or follow this blog, ‘stacked against us’ is very often the beginning of a really, really good story.

So, we soldiered on. My tiny team, led by the Virgin.
Heads bent, smell of sharpie piercing the air, we each poured out our desires for The Experience.

Here are some samples:

May every single woman feel loved and inspired.
May our season be more joyful, more juicy, more turned on, more fun than we could imagine.
May there be more turn-on, orgasm, and pleasure for all!
May we feel deeply connected as a team.
May it be easy.
May we look smokin’ hot.

And there were practical desires too.

May we attract hundreds and hundreds of hungry women who get the feeling and experience of sisterhood they didn’t know they were craving.
May the venue love us.
May Storm Large say yes to our invitation to perform.

Yesterday, we gathered again as a team to process the event, together. We lit the altar candles and one by one, I read those intentions we created, four months ago.

We were gobsmacked and flabbergasted. Full body chills. We realized, together, that every wish, every hope, every desire had been granted.
And more.
And then some.
Because Life is generous.
The event we dreamed was full of ease and grace and love.
It had greater impact that we could have dreamed, and took us places we have been longing to go, on both the inner and the outer.
We did look hot.
2,335 women fell deeply into sisterhood.
Our team had fun.
And Storm F—–ing Large said yes. She showed up big time. And, in a see-thru gown and glorious bodysuit, she sang THIS.

It was a reminder — every day we need these reminders — that ritual is real, that intention matters, that we are more supported than we know.

This is a season of so much muchness.

It is a season of revelry and noise. Of big meals and gatherings.
Of expectations and obligations. Of feeling not-enough and too much, simultaneously. Of disappointment. Of hope. Of duty and responsibilities. Of heartache and loss. Of gratitude and wishes. Of busyness, so much busyness.

And here in the northern hemisphere, it’s a season of long nights. Of darkness.

Time to light candles.

What might you light a candle for? What is something that your soul desires that seems out of reach? What could you intend for yourself? Each morning and for the season? For the year ahead? What rituals do you already practice? What rituals might you begin? Sisters, inspire me. Inspire us.

Keep lighting the way back to ourselves.


Regena Thomashauer, aka “Mama Gena”
The School of Womanly Arts

Regena is a feminist icon, a teacher, a speaker, a mother, a best-selling author, and creatrix and CEO of The School of Womanly Arts.

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